C-PTSD

Finding care for trauma is often a difficult and challenging process, one that requires a lot of patience. For parents and those who love and care for the kids living with the effects of C-PTSD.

Sleepless nights as they often struggle to cope with painful emotions, flashbacks, and nightmares that come with the traumatic experiences. Many times the behavior reflects this lack of sleep, because the brain is tired too...causing hypervigilance. They become more unregulated. Very tiring. They have trouble managing their emotions and forming relationships with others and difficulty with executive functions. They start fearing separation from their parents or caregivers. We then feel guilty for taking time for ourselves especially if we think we have increased the odds of a meltdown or episode. None of this is intentional manipulation as many on the outside try to say it is, they are observers from the outside, we are living it daily. We struggle with these kiddos who truly travel this scary tunnel of emotions and feelings when the brain is in trauma response, and we are feeling all of this with them, until we have had enough...then...WHAT..,

we have to break away and go have a meltdown and try to self care, but where? With WHO?

Guilt? Our own anger at the situations we feel are beyond our ability to comfort or change, again-It's tiring on us so why would we go to our friends and family to save the day yet again. And again. Isolation. The days seem to close in with us using the word "HOW" in sentances alot...

They cry and scream a lot, they begin to eat poorly and lose weight, want sugar, makes them happy, so we give in- big mistake yall! or they over, eat, and gain weight they have impulse indulge issues or hand to mouth fixations. The ability to think through consequences is not there especially if they had a handful of skittles and a sunny D as a snack, and they just act and react. Endorphines and brain altering substances never mix well but who knew; who had time to know all this when our world is upside down and sideways- so wherever there is a little temporary happy or joyful kiddo I am all for it, but now I know that was a bandaide on a wound per say. So if you really think about it, many children have had diagnosis of ADD or ADHD, misdiagnosed.

Being labeled the problem child, because in social settings most are not gonna know their story, the pain that settles inside them, the loss of their internal joy that they did nothing to deserve to lose-or where they're coming from. The observers just think "well that kid needs a spanking"or my child doesn't need to play with that child they're totally disruptive, that child has no regard for manners, personal space, things on and on.

It is a very difficult place to be for the caregiver or parent who loves that child because we always know the story, and the reason behind how they act, and we are also exhausted from explaing, not explaining, feeling the tension at the parents table at the birthday party and praying it all goes well this time. Please God just this time, let it be the friendship that is good for all of us...

Going to extremes, wanting to spend lots of times with friends or relatives, and then they may not want to spend time with them at all, with anyone, and just be alone. The thing that I noticed the most was the irritability and constricted playtime, the lack of imagination or mood or exploration when it was time to play alone, it was traumatic and whiny play with toys and had difficulty using her imagination or it went the opposite and everything was lined up and a sense of need of control over the objects.

Then, when the friends came to play there were the times when she would just not join in, If it wasn't her way, she would just go off and play and then say that they didn't want to play with her at all and believe that, It was her perception. It wasn't really the reality of those who observed. Child play with others is should be wide open with a somewhat busy body attitude, creativity and working things out-of course there are times when kids just don't play well together, that's not what we're talking about.

The five forms of childhood trauma in the statistic reports in 2023 is:

Violence, neglect, emotional abuse, physical abuse, and sexual abuse.

The four main things that childhood trauma deeply affects:

Mental health, cognitive function, the ability to form reciprocal relationships and of course the childs sense of self-worth.

When I began my studies 8 years ago, I just filed it in my research as : Domestic PTSD, diving into this, there were no technical terms yet now it's called C–PTSD and we get to the reality of the domestic part of this trauma and the triggers- ah the triggers are reminders of the traumatic events, and they can be almost anything, sounds smells, music, articles of clothing, places, or people who remind the child either of consciously or unconsciously the abuse or the event. Triggers can cause memories to suddenly surface.

Take inventory on that for a moment.

We are here to help, this is part of our intake and process and how we help you with this enormous reality and so keep reading. No need to panic. I know that if you are awakening right now in this and connecting, it is not our way to leave you in this but to say come with us, join us, we know the way. I know the way...

Truth.

There is life beyond this and we are here to help you transform. See your child as resillient and someday fly...

Domestic PTSD homestead triggers...Most children would not know how to convey that in words and it becomes an answer to some things huh?, see the circle?

The research says that age two or three are the ages that trauma will likely not be remembered -however, I tend to believe that the mind and heart records at all from when you are born and you cry your first cry. From the get-go. And I have known someone 50 years who does in fact, remember abuse at the age of two.

Neuroplasticity and the neuro-path that gets disrupted by the trauma: another entire blog post.

The great thing is that we are such resilient creations, The brain is flexible and healing as possible.

It is all centered around the HIPPOCAMPUS and the AMYGDALA.

There is brain retraining by movement and exercises, which is an energy, of course moving that trauma energy out this was some thing that even though I didn't understand, mine did sports and exercise which was soccer, basketball, a bike, a trampoline-even though she was young I kept her moving I just kept her moving and not GOING I kept her moving. Big difference. It was another knowing that I had learned the hard way but I actually know how useful it really is with the information I now have.

And teaching them practices of self-care and breathing. There are so many different methods of breathing. A few I use that actually forces wonderful amounts of air into our central nervous system! I didn't really know about this one as I do now, but I remember my daughter even as a adult would always hold her breath, and I would have to say breathe...

I would catch her holding her breath for long periods of time. I really had no clue, but now I do. And now I'm here to help you. That's what I think she would want me to do wiith all these hard lessons.

I now believe in several times a hour on a stressful day giving into good long lung filling breath, a deep breath in and out -then sucking in one more time so that it feels like you're gonna explode LET IT OUT - A fast track to a nap...when we were kids, we used to get so upset and it sounded like we were going to hyperventilate. All it did was make us tired. We were actually intuitively breathing in very hard and shoving oxygen in our system for our brain so it could relax. And all we did ----just went to sleep. See it's true. All we ever really needed to know we learned in kindergarten.

It is imperative to practice prayer and meditation. These are two ways that can help a child identity, develop positive adaptive response to their anxiety, and it will empower them. It will form new neural pathways that can lead them away from the area, where the impact of trauma disrupted the neural connectors. The brain rewiring towards recovery and the reconnection of synopsis and new Nuro stems have begun. It creates new brain maps. We want to incorporate what promotes growth of new neurons and believe it or not even video games help children however these video games must be regulated because the lights and speed of activity these games can either be good or not based on certain formatting and lighting. Most of all is the duration of time that your child spends on device. In the current culture we have a shortening of the attention span to a whopping 10 seconds, because of the amount of time a child has a device in front of them. This is directly affecting their brain.

It is good for children to make music, music has several brain benefits. There is vibrations that happen to music and frequencies, and all of these things go through the senses, and my all-time favorite is making art being textile using your imagination and your creative child self, I'm a firm believer, and can testify to the fact is a sure way to relieve the brain of stress and bring about a peaceful moment .

This is not a shocker, but it's hard to get your child over the age of six to do it but for a child trauma it's very important to TAKE naps. Yes, take naps.

Make a game of it but teach your child a new word, their vocabulary is way for their brain to also revitalize.

Helping encourage them to use the other hand but not always using their primary hand.

Walk a different way take a different path even in the grocery store just grab their hand and go a different Isle, new scenery allows further brain activity, brain games to question the destination to be even if they actually know where they are going is near, it's always good for a child because it stimulates the brain and brings out the inquisitive nature organically.

As I dig in for just a minute, what do we do to help the inner parts, we look at magnesium, vitamin B omega threes, we have to be careful with children but nowadays, our diets are so depleted of true vitamins, and minerals. However, look for foods, rich in these things it'll help.

EMDR I would actually like to take the premise of this and then video games and we are looking into how to incorporate this and do a program in our music and digital art center, it's going to be a really great part of our research development in this program.

....it's getting late and there's so much more and so just a little more...

I have found it to be extremely helpful and using pure unadulterated organic essential oils. Here is the most used essential oils for PTSD.

Lavender it can be used for shock, or if the child is staying in a fight or flight Behavior.

Rose is actually the most popular essential oil but it's pretty costly, used to treat anxiety and depression, and also known for grief, panic attacks, and even shock.

Chamomile is just an all-around favorite.

Lang Lang and clary, sage, sandalwood and Frankenscense and all four of those probably need to be used in moderation with children, and I would always advise using a carrier or with some With those four. I'm not a doctor and I never give medical advice. I have been using essential oils now for about 12 years. At one time I had a Mercantile and Apothecary with an organic spa, we compounded and blended herbs, oils, teas, and we would make our own fresh skin care products and all kinds of fun stuff , It was a really good season of life. I learned of lot and had a lot of amazing people that shared life and knowledge with me during those years.

Little did I know all the things I was learning throughout my life would accumulate in order to be doing what I am doing right now. Soon when we acquire our land where we will have all of our centers, we will grow our gardens, the children will come to learn about these things make all kinds of wonderful essentials that they will use in their life. Truly learn valuable things they can utilize, feel good about and grow strong, and even pass onto their children.

Instead of passing on the shortened telemere strands, disrupted cells, and fragmented effects of childhood of mental physical and spiritual brokenness . NO, They will pass on a different legacy of healing, grace, love. Gathering it all together, resilience and transformation, We are here to help the children and those who love them. Love is superpower.

Good Night and God Bless

TTkids.org

Lisa.